Pakistan - The Army/Government

If you're wondering why it is that the military seem to think they are the only people capable of ruling the country, its simple . . . because they are just about the only people capable of ruling the place. The Pakistanis love a man in a uniform. Just ask Benazir Bhutto. Leave aside the scenery, the hippies and the fact that Pakistan is a nice place if you don't mind suicide squads on the road . . . the place is a shambles: there has been a near civil war in the country between the MQM and the government in Karachi. There is constant butchery between Sunnis and Shias, the vast majority of the population is under 25 and unemployed. And the military are about the only institution who actually have the capability and discipline to get anything done in the place . . . except defend their own country, that is. They have managed to lose just about every war they ever started (and even the ones they didn't start). But they still love to rattle their rusty colonial-era sabers at the huge Indian army to their east and watch their backs as Afghanistan descends into the apocalypse. Warring tribes in Baluchistan, Sind, the North-West Frontier, and the tribal areas keep the army's bullets from corroding in their clips, while criminals and ethnic terrorists in Karachi, Quetta and Hyderabad make soldiers sleep with one eye open. Having China as a neighbor to the north and Iran to the west does not make flower power high on the political agenda either. The government, bolstered by total armed forces of 587,000 is actively stirring up revolt in what they consider to be occupied (by India) Jammu and Kashmir. In fact, they nearly went a bit too far during the latest round of "we've got more artiller shells than you have" with the Indians. But in the end, well, everybody kinda got a bit bored and agreed to start it all up again sometime next year. Pakistan supplies much of the Middle East's cheap labor and is the world's prime low-cost supplier of military troops. About 30,000 military contract personnel from Pakistan were serving with the UN in Saudi Arabia, Libya, Oman, the United Arab Emirates and Kuwait in mid-1989, mainly in an advisory capacity. On a less peace oriented mission Pakistani military officers have also been turning up in Afghanistan doing a little more than advising the Taliban. There have been complaints that the government actually makes money by renting out its poorly paid troops to serve in UN peacekeeping missions. The UN compensates Pakistan at a higher rate of pay, and the government allegedly pockets the difference. Pakistan is and always has been run by the army. Even when the latest corrupt politician is turfed as in October of 1999, it doesn't really surprise the locals. You have to give Pakistan an A for effort when it comes to defending their Muslim state.

Considering how often the polis get turfed by the military, and considering that Ali Bhutto was strung up and his son was killed mysteriously in France, and General Zia Ul-Haq died in a mysterious plane crash-it's a wonder anybody wants to run this country. Also if you have any tips on how to solve Pakistan's exploding birth rate, poverty and belligerent neighbors send a postcard to the:

"Why I Want to Run Pakistan Sweepstakes"

Office of the Prime Minister

c/o Pakistani Military

Islamabad, Pakistan

Fax: (+92) 51 821 835

http://www.na.gov.pk